A fellow actor told me I would make a great Magenta in a live performance of ‘Rocky Horror Picture Show’.  He followed up by asking if I can sing.  Stammering to answer, eventually I came out with a “yes”, explaining my hesitation how- despite mother’s teasing of my then preteen rendition of  Madonna- I have been told by a teacher, in a singer’s voice workshop, I am good enough and should go out for vocal auditions.  Confidence is the challenge I face when standing up to ambitiously belt it out in front of people.  Akin to anything, if you do not sing with all you have, from the depths of your guts, the outcome will be splintered.

Additionally, the aforementioned actor is currently undergoing chemotherapy in order to survive stomach [strike that, I was corrected, it is actually] “ASS” cancer.  In response to my embarrassed explanation he said “without being rude or insensitive, get over it- life is too short”.  Perspective is a wondrous skill.  He is, of course, absolutely right.  Keeping my voice private because of a silly fear to be judged is a handicap I volunteer to carry as my burden.  Realizing this, I can choose to cast off this albatross, just as I have forbidden ‘guilt’, now too shall I deprive fear.

To state in the affirmative: I foster innocence and demand bravery for this life.  It is no surprise to find often the two go hand in hand- when I shirk away from something due to fear, guilt remains for not going after my ambition.  No tomorrow is promised to me, and though I not-so-secretly dream of living to be an all around healthy 111 year-old, the best lessons I have learned from my elders has been one of no regrets, which notably includes saying and doing as you please (causing no harm to others) in pursuit of happiness.  A spry woman 95 years of age tickled me when she shared her two secrets to great health: sex and yogurt!  She made no qualms and did not take herself too seriously.  Life is about the living of it, for the brief whole time we remain above the ground.

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