Archives for the month of: August, 2012

Now do I understand

Strength in your command

Proud you’re my mammy

Because I can fly free

Striving to reach

Happiness hoped

For me

I admit what ’said’ s true


         Are a part of me too.

Honest caring friendship so fond

Hope, continues to grow more strong

Early sunlight reflects golden pond 

Nourishing both far beyond.

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Love’s true, unspoken words.

Obvious you’ll never part;

Very Essence, piece of you,

Every trace soul and heart

Hope; ever strong, more remains.

Endless thoughts together;

Always; Love will elope:

Laughter, time; sweet memories forever

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Acting revealed itself to me only after I moved to Los Angeles, where the buzz of everyone else doing it bred curiosity in me to discover “what’s all this about”?  The library is a wonderful resource for every endeavor, especially when you live in Hollywood and the subject is acting- I checked out any book: Stanislavski, Adler, Meisner, and every one on the business too.  Read them all, took thorough notes on all subjects and experiences almost to the point of obsession.  Feeling I was a late starter in my early twenties- most actresses seeming to have either been a child actor or gotten ‘the big break’ when barely legal to purchase a lottery ticket- my self-education about this much admired, and often under respected, art made me realize the never before fathomed: an integral piece of me had been neglected.

Poetry was a blessing, a therapeutic release, I began prolifically producing in the back of 9th grade Economics.  It flowed, fed by my life experiences and the entertainment I enjoyed- namely ‘The X-Files’.  One parental unit urged me toward becoming a lawyer, when I excelled in debate, and a doctor, when I demonstrated a natural inclination toward the sciences.  However, every tiny piece occurs in preparation for another, and so….university calculus became the catalyst for re-evaluation and realization true fulfillment requires artistry for me….furthered by reading borrowed books and amalgamated in the first acting school ever attended being a Meisner Technique Playhouse, discovered in the trade paper Backstage West: I knew I was fortunate to be a clean slate to soak up TRUTHFUL acting technique emphasizing REALISM.  Day one, the teacher queried where I had previously studied.  Believing it be the ritual for new comers, I shyly admitted the truth, though in two years of attendance not another student was asked.

Stanislavski aroused in my belly acting’s “poetic reflection of life’s experience”.   A fiery spirit was fueled, hungry to devour more.  I audited every class and teacher I could at my new home, Playhouse West, filling notebooks with insights.  Thus I befriended myself and the dedication required of acting so natural it goes unnoticed by the untrained eye.

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Since childhood, I have a fascination with wolves.  Perhaps it was growing up always with rottweilers (earnestly loving their little bear-cub looking puppiness and the sweet protectiveness ours grew into) while my best friends’ parents were cops with German shepherds.  Or maybe, being an only child until the age of twelve lent itself to the independent, lone wolf mentality.  In fact, wolves are endangered, misunderstood, and loyal.  When I began in Show-Business, my fledgling actor self arrogantly questioned “Why does anyone need an agent, except because the system says so?”; why give ten percent of moneys earned, when I am doing all the acting? Silly girl.

Now, working full-time as my own agent (submitting for auditions), manager (creating a brand/voice), and publicist (contacting media), I realize – when will I have time to audition, not to mention act in the parts I will procure!?!  And…. create time to continue efforts in attaining said opportunities to act professionally.  This is when I realize: an agent is not someone simply taking a cut, or working as a middle-person to weed out the truly talented from the masses of flash-in-the-pan wannabes.  An agent is a Professional, a dream I share.  Only mine is one of acting, and earning in complete sustainability of this humble lifestyle: TO ACT full-time is the goal. This, I realize, includes a business team– numerous persons putting together cover letters, headshots, resume, press packets, and providing professional relationships.

It is trite to read: if there is ANYTHING else you could be happy doing, by all means do it…. the truth is- the business side of the show can be tedious.  Having walked a block in the shoes of a show-Business professional, I barely have a glimpse of what their day in and day out drudgery entails.  I whole heartedly respect the side of the biz in which I have less experience.  Do what you love, and you shall be happy.  Part of my goals going forward involves developing a loyal pack to represent the vitality and passion for this art, with the prerequisite flair for the business aspect of this exhibition.

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