Archives for posts with tag: relationships

SundanceOn-set, talking with others tends to be easy- the outgoing side of my nature shines, making people laugh and enjoy the energy brought instantly.  However, another part of my nature enjoys quiet time.  Thankfully, when I was blessed with a commercial (turned out to be with J.Lo for Verizon) the energizing upswing was in full force.  I wonder now, if the “diet” I was utilizing (a book by nutritionist Haylie Pomroy) helped push those hormones in the positive direction.  Please, forgive the tangent.

Point being, the commercial paired me with an adorably freckled boy, Cameron, who looked like he could have been my kid.  His actual mom and I hit it off, having a poignant conversation-exactly what my little self needed to hear that day.  (Love those moments in life when you realize what is happening is the best medicine for you, and, truth is every moment IS that best cure.)  Thanks to the guidance of BBR Productions: I offered an exchange of information- handing the lovely mom, Whitney, my business card and we ended up connecting through Facebook.  This was months ago, and yet this week she messaged me: “Hey!!! Can u call me right now!!!!! I might have huge audition for u now!!!!”  Well, with that many exclamation points, I did not delay.

Though I had just crossed the threshold, home from filming on “White Collar”, having woke long before sunrise, I eagerly called her. She told me about a new game-show, “The Million Second Quiz” with Ryan Seacrest, auditioning for a questioner. Her agent had gotten her this opportunity, but she could not commit to a 12 day stretch of 12 hour shifts because she has children.  Two o’clock nap-time postponed, I raced, running in three-inch-wedge-heels to catch the train before departure… then sat waiting as it pulled away from the platform a good three minutes late.  Alas, the important part is I made it, happily in the rain!  It is required for the questioner to have good diction, smooth reading, and to remain confident with unfamiliar words- not providing a “tell”, right or wrong, when reading the answer choices: I got the part.

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-One person’s sole job is wetting the sidewalk, over and over Birdmanand over again- all night for five plus hours to keep it wet and give that slick, reflecting light look the camera loves (technical term is a “wet down”).

-Another person’s duty is putting smoke in the air: more smoke, less smoke, walk it through the set or location, fan it because there’s too much, the haziness is overwhelming the scene.

-One man (sadly it is a male dominated business, but what isn’t) is on a crane with a big spot-light to simulate a helicopter flyover in the shot.

I have not even mentioned the director, the stunts co-ordinator, or the caterer.  The point is- that long list of “credits” at the end of every [big budget $300 million dollar budget] movie prove just how many creative collaborators are necessary to manifest the entertainment we all spend our money to escape into for a couple hours of unbelievable safe excitement.

These people are Living what they dream.  They simply do not last otherwise because the stress is so immense one must Love it to stay in this business of SHOW.  With so many cooks in the kitchen, havoc and head-butting are sure to abound.  And yet we choose to show-up and take more work opportunities because the thrill to be a part is so rewarding.

This week I learned a new title- staff assistant- a position responsible to the A.D.s (Assistant Director- no explanation necessary right, the title is pretty self-explanatory), of which there are three: the first A.D., the Second A.D. and the Second 2nd.  Usually, there are a handful of staff assistants to act as extra hands, eyes, mouths for the Assistant Directors.  One such ‘staff assistant’ informed me on a recent day of filming 180 staff assistants were on-hand for a huge location shoot requiring the shut-down of a large well-know New York street!  I live by the motto/sutra “Do unto others…” and there for am genuinely friendly and interested in most everyone on-set; one because I am so thankful and happy to be there and two we are all there to accomplish the same goal so LET US HAVE FUN!

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KindredSpirit has been generous to nominate me for the ‘WordPress Family’ Award!  With humility, I am honored wordpress-family-awardand appreciative to Scott.

The rules follow:

1. Display the award logo on your blog.

2. Link back to the person who nominated you.

3. Nominate 10 others you see as having an impact on your WordPress experience and family

4. Let your 10 Family members know you have awarded them

5. That is all folks. Please pick 10 people who have taken you as  a friend, and spread the love.

We are all kindred writing spirits, see what I did there KindredSpirit,  and if I don’t pick you this ten around, your commitment and loyalty remain on my radar for the next nomination!  Please trust we are all still the best of writing comrades!!

May I present, Katrina’s Tantalizing Ten:

1.  Alastair  a photo-fabulous perspective and supremely supportive

2.  BBRProductions  achieve your dreams because your Life IS your business

3.  John W. Howell  a reader who writes

4.  Ralph  honesty and integrity

5.  Rev Dani Lynn  morality and healing

6.  Laurie Buchanan  Tuesday’s are a treat with thoughtfulness

7.  IAmForChange  uplifting and poetic

8.  Miss Ayo Délé  the most colorful photos to make you smile

9.  Seyi Sandra David  a spark of inspiration

10. Make A Right Left Here .com -a motivated entertainer sharing positive motivation

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To proclaim I live in New York City is a bit of a stretch.  An exaggeration (a loatheful, peevish admission) though it could be quantified as an ambition and goal.  I do live in New York, on an Island, which is Long, and near, relatively, to New York, the city. Recalling how recently it was, I looked up at the board in Penn Station struggling to comprehend and rocked to grasp some bearings, it all felt… overwhelming daunting… perhaps, certainly confusing, and blessedly remains ever amazingly new.

Today I worked shooting on-location at Grand Central Station.  Having never been before, but reading the description in the book “Winter’s Tale” by Mark Halprin, I was wonderfully excited to see. Living up to the name: it is indeed GRAND.  Standing there, looking up upon first entrance, mouth agape, to the seeming 20-story (realistically 11.5 stories at best, with the true height at 125 feet) azure sky, recently restored, celestial ceiling, I felt very small and in deep reverence of the extreme vaulting height.

This was an overnight shoot starting at 7 P.M., partially because

Snowing the Street on 'Winter's Tale'

Snowing the Street on ‘Winter’s Tale’

Grand Central Terminal (officially called since 1913) closes at 2 A.M. to the public, permitting a chase scene to be “put in the can”, as they say. There were abundant conversations and fun, freezing cold hands and feet for exterior scenes filmed, and countless exuberant/curious passersby and onlookers (natrally a few irritated ones too: one short police officer, with her finger in a man’s face, firmly repeated “Sir, you cannot pass.  You cannot pass, Sir.” whilst he was in a rush to catch a train down a tunnel he was not allowed to enter because it was our set for a few short hours)- all exciting bits of a big budget movie- and a peek of Colin Farrell, walking the white horse down the ‘snow’ covered road.  In reality, the ‘snow’ was copiously sprayed soapy suds; the horses were real this day. Walking alone at 4:45 A.M. to Penn Station (another first) the Peace and calm and alluring stillness of the always busy, bustling city filled me with joyous splendor- fore I was coming home from acting in it’s Great Grand Central Station.

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Many local librarians know me on a first name basis. Katrina Perkins Admittedly, I currently have as many books checked out as I have years to this Life’s experience.  Times past I would visit the “discount chain” store and impulsively purchase items.  These days, an impulse strikes me to learn about a subject (finance, speak French, meditate) or a specific book comes on my radar (a book club, movie soon-to-be/in production based on a book, or referenced in yet another book) and immediately I logon, sign-in, search the on-line directory and submit a request for pick-up at my nearby repository.  The New York library system is unrivaled, and gratitude saturates my existence to reside in a world wealthy in easy accessing of books, movies, and music.

Last year was particularly strengthening, in parts because within six months I divorced from a relationship spanning half my life and my Dad died.  Listening to CDs of chanting monks, Ayurvedic Sutras, and spiritual teachings checked out from the library became my salvation.  Calmed, perked, and inspired- I was reminded Life gives no more than can be consumed and to surrender to this blessing.  There was a moment, I believed I may very well be on the brink of  insanity- feeling so much ripped from my gut- in a state of not knowing anything, including how to sleep alone in a strange space alone.  I felt completely crumbled, and yet, still, undeniably uplifted.  When, acquiescing to the truth that only sane people have the where-with-all to contemplate such an inquiry as lucidity, a hope and appreciation for what I was previously blind to created a bravery I had not known to be possessed.

Many beautiful, fulfilling, inspired relationships and opportunities have come into Life.  Allowing myself to become open to them, thankful for each “wrong turn” fore the scenic route takes me on a drive past the lake I never saw.  Before, I felt myself to be alone- my mother is not one to speak frankly with, and as an only child mostly growing-up friendships are few, but flourishing.  Now, I respect “No man is an island” though occasionally forgotten in ego-ick-feelings.

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Religiously, a pot of white tea starts my every morning, even when the wake-up is 3 A.M.  My habit is to fill the cup below the brim, though, laughably, rarely low enough to include the essential cooling of soy milk, permitting immediate consumption.  Some see life, a situation, a moment, as half full, some sad souls perceive the same circumstance as half empty.  This 5’3″ force of nature, a rose named Katrina, contained here, for now, in a petite 110 pound meat sack, laughs in loud, luxuriant torrents, cascading melodious aplomb all over those in her cheery splash zone.  To me it is certain: Laughter IS the best medicine.

Last week it was my pleasure to work two days on the set of  a wondrous fairytale movie set primarily in 1916 Brooklyn-20121207-00083New York- based on a 25-year-old novel “Winter’s Tale”.  All it took was reading the words ‘flying horse’, and I was hooked.  Pegasus enamor me, always have, most memorably since discovering an amazingly detailed sketch by an anonymous, mysterious artist left in a book (on how to draw horses) checked out from the library when I was in elementary school.  I still have that drawing, and vividly remember its energy- the horse appearing to stomp the earth one moment prior to forcibly taking flight.  Art is magic.  Being able to escape into a make-believe imperfect-perfection for a few short sweet hours is a relaxing immersion in which most all of us partake.  I exude gratitude and beatitude to be even a sliver of one synergetic share in the production of creating visualized moving imagination.

Experiencing multiple fellow background actors recently, however, proved poisonous and off-putting.  Many complained about standing on the sidewalk in uncomfortable shoes with cold feet, passing pedestrians pushing/probing for information, and gossiped over a young celebrity they felt “had no right” playing an elderly star in her biography.  I was happy to be placed solo on my mark’s starting point, chatting and smiling with each glancing member of the crew.  To recall motoring by a film as it shot, curious and yearning to be a part, I exemplified appreciation at being on the recorded side of the camera lens.

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I have been exposed to a new term- “Background Whore”.  On-set consorting with fellow extras one man told me how he worked four, sometimes five, days a week using this term, though now his focus is honing his basketball skills so he can take advantage of the next commercial opportunity to be one of the tall players chosen.  A commercial pays more than double what one day as a television or movie background actor garners, plus possible residuals.  This young man revealed he had been working this way, ‘whoring’, for a year and a half.

Another actress posed the question of whether this (working as an extra) was my ultimate aim.  She did not mean to offend, however I was aghast, later realizing- it was a good question I needed to hear. Knowing the answer and taking action toward a truer goal- while I am full of gratitude to be making money to cover bills through this endeavor rather than relying solely on savings- I WANT A PRINCIPAL ROLE! and desire to focus efforts on achievement!!  This same day, still on the set of ‘Smash’, I was called to play a stewardess on Martin Scorsese’s current film project ‘The Wolf of Wall Street’.  Though far from the mark, still a step closer, an opportunity to share space and be seen- perhaps even bumped up to having a line by a well respected director.

From what I heard, redheads are favorably singled out by Mr. Scorsese. We shall see, indeed my hopes are this hearsay carries validity.  In any case, I will be on-set with one of the great film makers of our time and there most certainly will be something valuable to be learned.  Since becoming more re-familiarized working as an extra, I feel I have lost some of the curiosity and irreverence from my first day on ‘Made In Jersey’.  Then I barely stayed in ‘Holding’, rather enjoying the outside and watching the movement of the crew and directors- staying out of the way- but also staying in eyesight: ever smiling.  Be interested, and you shall be interesting- I heard that cleverness somewhere smart.

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I am myself and no one else

I play the cards-fate’s deltas

Together, now we play this game

You and I “what is in a name?”

Unlike you; I win! You lose.

Not comprehending my recent rouse

You yell and scream..

Left in your dream.

Permitted your reality;

Allow me mine and let me be.

I know you’ll do what’s good for you.

Be sure I’ll do the best for me.

My reason lies within..

Relies on me and where I’ve been

As well as what my future holds

Which by no psychic can be told

You believe you could control me

How naive would I have to be?

Intelligent manipulation

One fallacy of our great nation

Oxy-MORON

Died in the wool

Wake-up beautiful

My brain does function, while

You con-nect dis/junctions

Do not maintain your refrain

Please, challenge your own brain

Freedom relished- understood,

Able to do all I wished I could.

Happiness- adulthood-

Anticipation of what I should

Do for Me and not for you.

Not bound by your sad missed venue,

I impart upon My journey

Of Life and World and all Beauty.

Discover, Learn and be myself

create and fill my own bookshelf

With what is mine, my mind inside

Though not haystly rushed before I

Careful, Cautious- True-

For Me, -not for you?

Individual- I stand

Holding humanities soft touch hand.

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Sundays occasionally prove emotionally challenging.  As the eve of returning to the five day, nine to five, work week at a job lacking the creativity I yearn to fill my life- Sundays signify the end of Freedom. Sometimes I persevere, redirecting slight depression to focus on seizing moments in pursuit of opportunities to sustain this standard of living through Acting.  There is a value to having a job, and I am grateful for the ‘comfort’ to pay the bills and throw a twenty percent chunk straight into savings.  I am even more thankful to have chosen to live within my means, rather than beyond them as so many people fall into the trap of doing.  Each day I show up for the job, I am closer to a monetary goal which will create true freedom by allowing me to wean from the “real job in the ‘grown-up’ world” and court the passion of my life full time.

Since the beginning of this year, monthly goals have been set toward gathering tools to market myself, to research/establish industry contacts, and to work the net of afore mentioned contacts- all while saving for a future truly free to achieve a dream with dedication. Postcards, business cards, a website, this blog, and a growing list of newspaper writers, casting directors, and agents are the beginning to create an awareness of my name.  A casting director is only going to ‘find’ me once I put myself on her radar.  By sending a postcard with my eye-catching headshot and website information on one side and a short paragraph expressing genuine enthusiasm for his projects- past, current, and future- on the other side, praising her wins without asking for anything in return, I have created my very first !BLIP! on his screen.

In a month, I’ll follow up with two fresh, flatteringly honest paragraphs to !BLIP! her again with my presence.  Eventually my bonafide interest in him generates great possibility for her to affirmatively reciprocate a request for a write-up or audition.  It’s NOT ‘who you know’; rather ‘IT IS WHO KNOWS YOU’.  I am passionate about becoming known!  !BLIP!